NEW LIVING CAVEMAN DISPLAY TO GO INTERNATIONAL!

INTERNATIONAL BREAKING NEWS!In a recent development from the success of a rather unique experiment, the media has been notified to the effect of the International Coalition For The Promotion Of Caveman Mythology seeking volunteers to "man" their new series of "Caveman displays" at international level zoos around the world.

"The experiment just started as an idea while looking through an old gradeschool textbook" said Dr. Nuckledragger, "a few of us got together over lunch and between the tear ridden laughter at the information in the pages, it dawned on us that this would make a great zoo exhibit. After that it all just kind of put itself together and we launched the first experimental exhibit in California of course, which proved to be a resounding success."

Dr. Nuckledragger has issued a formal request for "auditions" to populate the new zoo exhibits and notes that while it isn't a "pre-requisite," it is preferred that the participants be prone to excessive body hair. Men, women and children are encouraged to audition. If it is that you know how to start a fire with rocks and sticks, this is also a big bonus. If it is that you are excessively hairy and can start a fire with rocks and sticks, then you are a "shoe in" for sure.

If it is that you find you are not prone to excessive body hair, "don't let that discourage you" said Dr. Nuckledragger "we can just paste hair on your naked body where it is needed to make the display more believable."

As well it has been noted that participants should NOT have any inhibitions, as they are displayed in what is widely thought to be the "Caveman" manner, that being absolutely naked, except for the hair covering their bodies... and perhaps some very limited costuming as the project develops. Participants will be treated as are all other animals in the zoos which inhabit the "natural habitat exhibits." As well, participants are going to be expected to perform everyday functions such as defecation and sexual intercourse in the manner of most monkeys in such existing displays. For that, being an exhibitionist is a definite plus. Especially if you are a rather oversized (both male and female), very hairy exhibitionist which can start a fire with sticks and rocks.

As for scripting, it is widely believed that such will develop as does the project.... beginning at first with improvisational grunts, primal screams and moans.

For those with concerns about gluing hair on their bodies, or those of their children, it has been stated that the "glue" will be semi-permanent, though non-toxic as far as you know. Meaning that it is meant to stay on your body for some months at a time.... and as far as anyone knows, there have been no ill effects from such long term use.

These positions are open to ALL ethnicities, races and creeds. Especially the really hairy (and somewhat smelly if you so desire) variations of human examples within each of them. Please be willing to participate in naughty, dirty animal like sex including grunts, some biting and scratching as well, which will be performed impromtu and mostly in full view of others to demonstrate the manner in which humans won the "procreation, survival of the fittest."

The "cave-women" are to be encouraged to throw rocks and scream at the "cavemen" allot. Especially before and after sexual intercourse. This has proven to be one of the more popular aspects of the experimental exhibit and is sought to be carried on into all of the other displays.

Should a participant become pregnant or go into labor during their tenure in the exhibit, it is to be incorporated into the display in the most natural manner the facilities can produce. This means that it will be possible to actually view and document the gestation and birth of little "caveman" babies in the most natural representation of authenticity which can be managed in our modern day.

....And you thought that monkey babies were cute and popular!



Moron this as it develops.